Monday Rant: Celebrities

MONDAY RANT: CELEBRITIES

Alright, I will be blunt. I don’t give a shit who’s doing who in the celebrity world. I don’t care that some stupid celebrities had a baby girl they named Flashdrive, or that they bought this wannabe cyborg baby a three million dollar pacifier. I don’t care that Kim Kardashian showed off her mammoth ass for everyone to see. If I wanted to see mammoth asses, I would go to Wal-Mart at literally any time of day. Or, you know, look in the mirror. I don’t care that so and so had a wardrobe malfunction (coincidentally when they had a new album/movie coming out).

Now if Kim Kardashian got ate by a walrus, then I might be interested in that. But only videos, no new report please. Certainly not headlines.

kim kardashian

What is it that makes the media think that we really care about some of the talentless trash that they are cramming down our throats? I really don’t care that some over privileged royal family isn’t seeing eye to eye. You know what, they are just people. We had a family reunion and it (miraculously) didn’t come to drunken blows. That didn’t make the news. It should have at least made the 6 o’clock news. But it didn’t.

But really, what’s the point of all this? Does anyone really care that a scumbag singer is cheating on his wife? Like, who didn’t see that one coming? Why are we so obsessed with celebrities lives? They are just people. Most of them aren’t even good people. They are just people. They shit and piss the same way we do, they just make a ton of money for very little talent.

And I don’t want to sound like a conspiracy theorist (well, maybe a little), but have you ever noticed that at some points certain things that aren’t specifically news worthy get blown out of porportion? Have you ever watched to see at those points what exactly is going on with our government? Seriously, when Miley Cyrus was all the rage for shaking her flappy ass all over Bettlejuice’s junk there was a lot of shit going on. And we missed it. Or, the media just didn’t want us to know what was happening. You decide.

Mileybeetlejuice

Now, I’m out of fuel and it’s very cold, so I finished this post quickly before abandoning ship. (Don’t worry, fuel arrives tomorrow.)

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